What your iPod says about you
By Tyler
Oh, iPod. The earbuds have become ubiquitous, the scroll wheel came to define usability and nearly everyone had one on their wish list. You’d think after so many years and so many versions that the sales would dramatically slow down, but they really haven’t.
Without the iPod, we wouldn’t have the iPhone or the iPad and Apple certainly would not be as big as it is now. In fact, Apple has attributed many PC switchers to them buying iPods after iTunes became Windows compatible. Only Sony’s Walkman had as great of an impact on mobile music listening.
Here’s a breakdown of each (current) model, along with the personality type I usually see owning it:
1. iPod Shuffle You’re either an athlete of some kind (usually a runner) or don’t have a lot of discretionary income. If you’re a runner, you bought it so you wouldn’t have to worry so damn much about a strap or pouch and if it breaks from concussion or water, it’s fairly easily replaced. You probably bought your favorite color or the one that best matched your jewelry. If you’re not a runner of some kind, you bought it to look cool and you probably constantly complain that it can’t fit all of your rap albums you downloaded from Limewire (yeah, I went there).
2. iPod Nano You really, really wanted an iPod because everyone else had one but you had no idea why, but you bought the Nano because it was easily the trendiest of all iPods. You usually listen to it while sitting at your computer, making its portability useless. The latest model is seemingly small enough to be used as a watch, though you’d have to be pretty geeky to go that far. You most likely have blue or silver, especially if it was a gift. The Nano is by far the most likely to be a gift than any other iPod.
3. The iPod Classic You had no idea what iPod to get and you’re probably over 50. Your music/video collection is nowhere near as large as the capacity of the Classic (your computer hard drive is probably smaller) but you bought it anyway because you were always taught to allow for extra storage. Those over 50 probably thought the bigger screen would be easier to read and the scroll wheel easier to navigate. Those under 50 are probably pissed that their Classic still works, so they can’t justify buying a new, shinier model.
4. iPod Touch You probably REALLY wanted an iPhone, but are either locked in your own contract or on your parents’ plan. You’ve probably owned a Game Boy/PSP/other handheld device in the past and think of the Touch as more of a toy than a mini computer. I’m also betting you really, really wanted a cool Apple product, but a MacBook was out of your price range. Also betting that you paid half while your parents paid the rest.
5. iPhone 4 You are obviously awesome and understand the power that mobile near-computing brings. You most likely don’t make many calls, instead relying on texting, email and social networks for your communication. You probably own at least one Apple computer and have affixed Apple stickers to devices that aren’t made by Apple. If you’re NOT an Apple fan but you own an iPhone 4, you probably wish you were geeky enough to own an Android phone but can’t reassure yourself that you know how it works.
Which one are you?

About Tyler
Storyteller. Inspirator. Opens bananas like a monkey. Minimalist runner. Eliticist. Have my name on my shirt. Knows all the words to Baby Got Back.
4 Responses so far.
Brian
September 29, 2010 at 3:03 ammy iPod is a Nexus One… I think what that says about me is that I'm really really awesome.
Mashi
September 29, 2010 at 9:55 amPlease tell me this is a parody article so I know whether to be offended or not.
Tyler Hurst
September 29, 2010 at 9:57 amMashi -
I have, at one time, owned four of the five items on that list. I still own a shuffle, nano and iPhone 4.
I'm 31.
Vulpine
March 24, 2011 at 5:23 pmWell, let's see. I own an iPhone 4, but I use it most for phone calls and navigation help; combined with reading email and sometimes tagging music for identification and download.
I also own an iPod classic–at 80GB it manages to hold all my iTunes music, or all my videos, but not both. Considering my video library is growing, I'm going to need a 250 next time.
I own Nanos, but they're a v.1 and v.2 model, not one of these v.5s. They replaced my original iPod v.1 which died after serving as the primary audio source in my car for 4 years, winter and summer along the NEC. Interestingly, only the battery died–the unit itself would work still if I bothered to replace that battery.
Now, what does that say about me?
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